Of stupid people/questions and other assorted foibles

Among the many stupid questions I am asked frequently “Why are you always so happy” and “Why do you smile so much” top the list.

Initially I assumed these were trick questions and waited to see if something would follow. Then I slotted them in the questions-that-had-no-correct-answers category and refrained from answering them.

But coming across an increasing number of stupid-people-armed-with-even-more-stupid-questions everyday I feel the need to prepare myself with suitable answer/s.
Since my answer “Because I have a lot to be happy about” only worked initially and that too only for a bit, because then I was asked to elaborate on what I was happy about (I’m telling you, stupid people just don’t give up!) I have now armed myself with counter questions like “Why are you so ugly” or “Why are you so short” or “Why are you so inquisitive”. Nice,no? ;)

The other stupid question on the list is “How are the cards doing/what do the cards say” *and this question realllllyyyyyy infuriates me!!* Do you ask a surgeon “How’s your scalpel doing” or ask a doctor “How are your patients doing”? (If you do, you need help) They why ask a Tarot Reader how her cards her doing EACH AND EVERY TIME you meet her both online and otherwise???? *beginning to tear my hair apart here*
And if couldn’t get any worse, the above question is followed by a smug “Ain’t I clever for askin’ such a smart question” smile.
The cards don’t have health issues, so they are always doing fine nor do they whisper in my ear because of which I don’t really know what they have to say. And no, I don’t think you are incredibly clever either. There! I feel so much better already. This answer rocks too! *wink, wink and smug smile*

“Why do you wear goggles?” Is that even a question, I ask myself each time I am faced with it! *Goggles? GOGGLES? Honest to God, I thought that word was more outdated than anything else could be!*
I love buying and wearing SUNGLASSES and though I can’t boast of a collection yet I do have some very good pieces that I wear frequently. Besides the fact that they look good on me, they also protect my eyes from sunlight *and isn't that what they ARE worn for???*
But, instead of such a long-winded answer I just turn around and ask “Why don’t you?”
That shuts them up! ;) I have other ones lined up too, like “Do you wear underwear?” or “Do you have both kidneys” *totally irrelevant I know, but then that IS the point (lol)*

Now I am all prepared for the next person who wants an answer to a “Why” *wicked grin and madly twinkling eyes* and shall keep you updated.